I come back after the weekend to find these posters plastered all over the dorm hallway:

One of my hall neighbors is missing her gnome. His name is Gnomeo–description above. If anyone has any information on his whereabouts, please inform the Fourth Floor Bureau of Investigation (or the FFBI). And, apparently, the fourth floor is also chronically drunk. (That’s actually not too far off from the truth.) My life is so average!