I have been betrayed. Completely and utterly betrayed.
The unforgivable kind of betrayal that you only find out about after the act itself.
It was of the cheese and garlic variety.
My roommate–you know who you are!–went to Red Lobster. Without me.
No, but really, those cheddar bay biscuits are to die for. And if you are one of those people who claim to dislike Red Lobster biscuits, whatever your excuse is, I’m not so sure I can trust you. Unless you’re allergic, in which case: I am SO sorry.
I think my roommate thought I was actually going to be mad about the fact that she went without me (we were casually talking about planning a trip for endless shrimp and cheddar bay biscuits), but the thing I was really mad about was that she told me about it before I could use my awesome “cheddar bay betrayal” line!
I had it all planned out in my head: I was going to ignore her until she said something to me, and then I was going to make a face and say “I’m not speaking to you right now.”
She would ask why (because, duh, everything always goes the way I plan it in my head.) (Yeah, clearly not.)
And then it would be the time–my time to shine–and I would respond with, “you thought I wouldn’t notice the scent of your cheddar bay betrayal?!”
(There were leftovers in the fridge).
It was going to be awesome! I was going to finally be able to land a joke! I was so excited!
And then what did she do? She came and told me about it first!
I’m still a little bitter. The joke didn’t have nearly the same impact after that.
Ugh, oh well.
On a totally separate and completely unrelated note, I was going through old blog post ideas the other day and found this for a potential post: Things Only Survivors Can Do.
I read it and thought: oh, this might be interesting. Except, when I flipped the page over to see what exactly was part of the list, there was only one thing written there. (Because, if you don’t know by now, I really like listing things. Even blog posts that don’t start out as a list, somehow always manage to become one. Bizarre phenomena, really…)
The one example of a thing only survivors can do said the following: Write a How-To Manual
I almost died. For some reason I just thought that was the funniest thing ever; probably because I would be one of the idiots who couldn’t write one due to the fact that I died in the process of doing whatever it was the manual was about.
I tried to brainstorm for a little about the different possibilities of what else might be on that list, but nothing was better than a “how-to manual,” so I stopped. If you have any ideas, let me know, but I just thought I would share this with you; so that, either way, it would see the light somehow 🙂
Anyone prepping for NaNoWriMo, by the way? I just outlined my schedule and I’m already nervous! I just have to brush off the nerves, square my shoulders, and say: LET’S DO THIS!
And then, you know, actually do it.