A doodle story that takes place when I should be listening to my math professor.
Let’s Start At the Beginning…
Polly-Wolly is the Princess of Periwinkle Castle. Her favorite hobbies include riding her ponies, braiding hair, and doing other extremely girly things that make the average human a little bit nauseous. She can only sing-talk (something her doctor calls singalongtitus), which makes it difficult when she actually wants to sing, because then she is just talking.
Ninja Ned guards the gates to the Periwinkle castle, but his face covering tends to prevent him from discovering Polly-Wolly before she can escape into the dark night. He is in love with Polly-Wolly almost as much as he is in love with his own reflection–but only when he is reflected in some form of water. It often prevents him from catching Polly-Wolly once she has escaped.
She easily makes friends because of her innocent personality. She also has a surprising ability to come up with brilliantly mischievous plans while thinking on the same level as, say, a seven year old. Her doctor is still trying to discover whether those two things are related. She really likes stickers and coloring pencils. Her favorite thing to do is read Pride and Prejudice–a novel on a reading level that mystifies the adults in her life (which, so far in the story, is only her doctor).
Pirate Pete is certainly cranky. He also has a theme song, but I can’t quite remember it at this moment. I’m only the narrator after all. Hum-hum-hum, something like that. He has a nasty silver hook that sometimes he changes to a nasty gold hook (for fancy occasions), and his hat has a frowny-face on the top, drawn in invisible ink. He’s kind of a boss.
The day of Princess Polly-Wolly’s sixteenth birthday, she was quite bored indeed. You see, being the only person in the castle aside from her ninja bodyguard, could be tough on a teenager. Ghosts are nice and all, but they can’t play games because the pieces just fall through their arms, and the unicorns had to stay in the barn. Even the servants were a bit glum and dreary; talking animals are only fun for a short time. After all, a Princess can only hear so many stories about “Back in my day when there wasn’t any of this deforestation nonsense…”
Suffice it to say, her birthday was looking pretty blue.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, a magical wand came flying through the window. It smacked her in the head, but it was alright since it was mostly hollow in there anyway. Picking it up off the floor, she gave it a flick, and suddenly a winding glass staircase spiraled out of the window down to the grass below. Without a thought, she tore off down the stairs and escaped into the early morning!
This made her Ninja Guard Ned unhappy an hour later when he finally noticed her disappearance. You see, he had caught a glimpse of himself in the early morning dew and that had kept his attention for quite some time.
There was one who noticed her escape, however, and though he was only four hours old, Gregory knew something was amiss! Purple clad princesses don’t just run around anywhere, you know. So he decided to travel a long ways to the castle–300 feet! That’s almost 5 years in snowman time.
It took him about seven and one quarter minutes. By the time he reached the front doors, he was already starting to melt. He could feel the beads of snowman sweat dripping down his carrot nose. He lost almost two pounds with the effort; it was quite a feat. He was very proud.
His excitement was soon lost, however, when the Ninja Guard Ned came to see who was making all of the ruckus and accidentally became entranced in the puddle of snowman sweat (which is just melted snow, by the way). Now what’s a snowman to do???
Which led to her feet being glued to some rocks just outside of the castle. (She’s also not very good at running away). Unfortunately the sun was really hot and she wasn’t quite bright enough to remember that the wand she held was magical, and was thus unable to conjure up some shade. Or to, you know, unglue her feet…