A Used Fly-Swat And The Crazy Dead Cat Lady

Yay, it’s Sunday! Which means I owe you–lovely reader–a post.

So, if you’ve been following along with this blog, you know that I am neither tech savvy, nor do I have any patience with anything that is technology. I have been having issues with my school email and am this close *I’m pinching my fingers together* to chucking my computer out the window. But then I couldn’t write anymore posts, and that would be sad.

I thought I’d tell you about roommates today. For those of you who have not experienced the #1 college dilemma of all time, I am about to bring down the house. I happen to have a super-duper awesome roommate, but I have a few friends back home who didn’t get so lucky.

Rupee’s roommate, for example, likes to shuffle through her stuff. One day she left a sticky note on Ruppe’s pillow that said, “I’ve hidden your fly-swatter somewhere in this room. Find it.” She had hidden the fly-swatter beneath Rupee’s pillow. A used fly-swatter. Ew.

Apparently this has become a sort of game in Rupee’s roommate’s mind, and she likes to hide stuff all over the room. I don’t know about any of you, but I personally find that to be more than a little creepy. It would be one thing if the whole thing was a joke between friends, but this is definitely one-sided. Rupee doesn’t think it’s very funny at all. I can understand that. I told Rupee she should request that her roommate hides money; then at least she’ll get something out of it. I don’t think she did, though.

And then there’s Sophie. Oh, Sophie. Having trouble with a roommate is one thing, having trouble with multiple suitemates is quite another.

First let me start by saying this: In the case of most colleges, there are two ways dorm halls are set up. It’s either two people to a room with community bathrooms, or four people to a suite (in which case the cleaning and maintenance is up to the suitemates). Sophie lives in a suite-style dorm hall.

One of the girls she bunks with prefers not to shower. I’m not sure if it’s a lazy thing, or self-cleanliness just isn’t a major priority, but she does not smell like a field of daisies. Not even close. The suitemates tried Febreze, but when that didn’t work, it was decided that something had to be done. And who do you think lost the game of rock-paper-scissors that determined who would confront the girl about her stink? Yes, that’s right, it was Sophie. Now the girl showers about three times a week (which, before you say anything, is better than three times a month!)

But that’s not where Sophie’s troubles ended. One day after she had come back to the room for a nap, Sophie came across another one of her roommates messing with something on the floor. There was a lot of dirt and it smelled horrific. So, Sophie did what any normal person would do. She asked her roommate what she was doing.

“It’s a science project,” she said.

“And what is that?” Sophie asked, pointing to the bag of dirt and stinky objects.

“A dead cat.”

Yes, that’s right folks. The girl had found the remains of a dead cat, and brought them back to their room to bleach the bones.

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW??? I thought these things could only happen on television (or in really creepy movies), but apparently it happens in real life too. Oh.

Please don’t let this freak you out, not all roommates are psycho-crazy. Like I said, mine’s cool. I guess it’s just the luck of the draw.

YOLO,

Mel

 

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